Heather Mills Photography and guest contributor, Claire Murphy, MD, FCAP, hematopathologist
What happens when a physician becomes a mother—and discovers lessons beyond medicine?
This message is for the woman who thought she knew who she was—until motherhood revealed parts of her she never expected to discover.
Lessons I Didn't Expect Motherhood to Teach Me as a Doctor
Claire Murphy, MD, FCAP, hematopathologist
I was late to the party, first child at 39, having built my career as a physician, pathologist, now in my “forever home” job, in my “forever home” community of Eugene.
Not only did I want to celebrate the birth of my daughter, the grit it took, and the partially delusional happiness at one year with a family photoshoot, but I wanted to reflect on the transition within myself.
As a physician with a scientific mind, I didn’t expect to find transcendental calm in a healing bath prepared by my doula 5 days post-partum.
I didn’t expect the new connections I made with other moms in the community; mom-brains foggy but conversations attempted.
I didn’t expect my anxiety to decrease during the first 14 weeks and sustainably beyond.
I didn’t expect to communicate better with my husband.
Essentially, I achieved a higher state of consciousness and a oneness with the universe without psilocybin!
There are so many things that were expected, good and bad. The epic journey of breastfeeding, being a patient, a new relationship with sleep, the birthing, mothering and parenting garbage on Instagram, the vivid memories of the labor and delivery room, the going back to work transition, and the oh god just give away your old pairs of pants. You deserve new ones. Don’t even try them on.
One can drown in the world that is motherhood, career, partnerships and everything attached to it. The difference is now that I have finally embraced the Post-its that have been sitting on my desk: Radical Acceptance, Both Things Are True, Normal is Perfect and I Am Enough. I see it everyday in myself, the way I approach people, and the way I approach my patient care work.
I didn’t expect to be a better doctor and person after being a patient and mother--though emotional intelligence, higher level consciousness and insight. So, when I look at the photos of infant baby Erin and our family, I am filled with a sense of deep pride, life satisfaction and love.
Claire Murphy, MD, FCAP is a hematopathologist and Laboratory Medical Director at PeaceHealth RiverBend Hospital in Springfield, Oregon. A physician, leader, and advocate, she is passionate about patient care, education, and advancing the field of pathology.
A quick word from Heather Mills:
What stayed with me most from Claire’s story is that motherhood gave her a new perspective on herself—not just as a mother, but as a woman, a physician, and a person.
I think photographs become especially meaningful when they capture not just what we looked like, but how we saw ourselves in that season.
Because the woman in the photograph isn’t just someone we want to remember. She’s someone we want to recognize—the woman we are, the life we are living, and the person we are becoming… the blooming.
Thank you again to Claire Murphy, MD, FCAP.
